identity

Yesterday, I came to the conclusion that I have always had something to find my identity in, but I think that is true of most people.

When I was a young girl in school, I was smart.

When I got into high school and college I was a cheerleader. I told everyone that.

My last semester in college I started dating this guy so I was his girlfriend for 4 1/2 years.

After we broke up, I started running. Then, I was a runner. I found myself telling people so and it was a fact most people knew about me for my adult life.

Then, the unexpected happened. I was injured training for a marathon and never really healed. I didn’t know who I was. I couldn’t hang out with those friends anymore because they were doing something that I could no longer do -> run.

I struggled in trying to find my place in this world. I suddenly didn’t know where I belonged anymore.

I had been back in church for a year or two at this point so I was slowly but surely starting to recognize the gospel. So in the past 2-3 years I have found my true identity.

And, that brings me to yesterday I was sitting in church listening to the message when I had to write my ideas down.

I don’t ever have to wonder who I am or where I belong anymore, because I know that I am His and He is mine.

identity

That is where my identity lies from now till forever, in the love of Christ. I don’t ever have to wander this world alone again. I am saved by grace through faith.

For by grace you have been saved through faith.  And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God.  {Ephesians 2:8}

What about you?  Where do you find your identity?

Advertisements

unanswered prayers

unanswered prayers

I thank God every day that my ex-boyfriend and I never got married.  That was 5 years ago and I can’t imagine where I’d be if we did.  I can only think lonely, depressed, and unhealthy.

So, sometimes He says, in His infinite wisdom, “No.”  We may be hurt and cry and pout but, in the end, we thank Him, because like an earthly father he is acting in our best interest, even when we think He’s being unfair.

I’m sure you’ve seen or heard the saying – God has 3 answers for our prayers: Yes, Not Yet, or I have something better for you.  It’s so true, right?

I love this illustration of how we want to hold on to something so badly we don’t see what He has for us is so. much. better.

Just-trust-Me

We only need to trust.  Are you trusting today?  What is God asking you to let go of?

what’s on the horizon

Do you enjoy every sunrise and sunset as I do?  Do you look at it and know the beauty of our Creator?  Most days it brings tears to my eyes to see the horizon, to know that His mercies are new every day.  Not some days when He feels like it.  Not only on weekends.  Not only when I am doing my best to be His child here on Earth. Every. Single. Day.

That brings me to this.  I have felt a nudging in my heart.  That nudging has brought me to the conclusion that this is something God keeps putting in front of me for a reason.  He is in this, as He is in all things.  I try to not make huge life decisions without Him.  I say “try” because sometimes I fail and my selfishness takes over.

holy yoga

So, this thing that I’m going to do, or think I’m going to do, is Holy Yoga.  I am going to be an instructor.  It is my passion to lead other women in loving themselves and their bodies exactly where they are in a Spirit-filled atmosphere.

I have no formal yoga training.  I only practice at home. I am humble in all aspects of yoga (and ministering – this is scary to me).  But, I am willing to trust and I am willing to learn.  If there is one thing I can say positive about myself it’s that I am coach-able.

Therefore, I am taking up this journey.  I am going where the Spirit leads me, even if it is into deep, unknown waters.  I am trusting.  I am trusting in His timing.  I am trusting in His provision.  I am trusting in His sovereignty.

Have you ever practiced Holy Yoga? Where do you feel the Spirit leading you this year?  What are your new scary endeavors?

and if not…

Perhaps that is why, in His bewildering mercy, God sometimes shatters our fondest dreams, or at least allows them to be shattered.  (Whether He is the cause or merely allows it to happen, the result is the same.  And in the midst of the pain, the distinction doesn’t always seem important)

In His sovereignly run universe, the unthinkable sometimes happens–the nightmare we thought we’d never have to face.  And no relief comes, sometimes not for years.  More frequently than untested Christians expect, God removes the one source of joy and meaning that we were counting on to make our lives worth living, and replaces it with nothing.

These are the words from Larry Crabb’s “Creating a True Spiritual Community” that I was reading as my phone rang a few weeks ago.  I received news that my grandmother was being taken to the hospital in an ambulance.  No one could tell me what had happened or what they were doing.

I’m a thinker and sometimes I think that I think too much.  What’s going to happen?  What am I going to do?  What can I do?  But the truth is – God has already thought it through.  He already knows where it’s leading and where it came from.  He knows.  We always hope that the outcome will be good, that we will like His plan, but that’s not always the case.  We have to remember those wise words of Ann Voskamp:

And if not, He is still good.

Wednesday Wonderful

Wednesday-Wonderfulz-final-2-300x300

Ok, I’m joining a blog link-up with Lynda from fitnessmomwinecountry and How My World Runs this week.  We are sharing some of our favorites of all things.  I’ve never done a link-up like this before so this is something new for me.

Here goes:

Right now, and always, I’m loving Yogi hot tea.  I’m trying to cut down on my caffeine/coffee intake so the tea is a great replacement for now.  I love Yogi because it comes with so many different flavor for specific needs.  Here are all the ones I have now….someone may have a problem…

tea

One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp has turned my life around.  She has taught me how to love and live life fully right where I am.  Not looking for the next thing or a change to make me happy, but seeing the good in every situation.  I know what you’re thinking, and, yes, there is good in every situation.  I was a bitter Betty before reading this book and now I try to see the Light and shine it where ever I go.  Of course, I still struggle with bitterness, jealously, and disappointment, like we all do, but I’d like to think I’m getting over it more quickly now that I am letting gratitude run my life.  I have counted and named almost 100 gifts.  I will make it to 1000!

1000gifts

So, I think that’s all I’ll share for this week.  I’ll be sure and have some more “wonderfulz” #yeswithaz stored up for the next link up in 2 weeks!  Be sure to check out all of these awesome blogs!

What’s your favorite this week?

just breathe…

Have you ever just exhaled and not realized you’ve been holding your breath? You know the feeling.  You reach a point of contentment that you didn’t feel was possible at this stage in your life.  You didn’t realize you had been holding it in, stressed out, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Well, I took that giant exhale when my plane landed.  I’m at the shore.  The place I feel most at home.  The place I feel closest to God.  The place that soothes my soul.

I knew that I was stressed.  I knew I needed a break.

But today, this week, I feel calm.  I feel relaxed.  I feel…eucharisteo.  (This is a reference from one thousand gifts by Ann Voskamp.  If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it.  It’s enriching my giving thanks.)

1000gifts

The sound of the waves.  The feel of the breeze on my skin.  The sunset after a long hot day.  The feel of the sand between my toes.  The smell of the salt in the water.  These are all the reasons I am pulled to the beach.  I am compelled.  I am complete.

Where do you go to relax?

How do you find the calm?